![]() |
| Stacy, like many working women, put off motherhood until stable in her career. |
Over the past couple of decades,
more and more women are waiting
longer to have children or not
having children at all. According to
percent of women aged 40-44
have never given birth, up 80
percent since 1976. One possible
explanation given by the study is
that improved job opportunities
have helped create an alternative
for women. Today, we often hear
how careers come first, then family.
Paula Malozowski, 30, and her longtime boyfriend got married in 2010 because they were ready to have a baby, but then life happened. A year and a half later the couple is happily married, have since bought a house and Malozowski went back to school to change career paths. She still desperately wants a baby, but the plans have been put on hold for the time being while she finishes her Master’s Degree Program.
“I can work, go to school and be a mommy, but only two of those three things at a time,” says Malozowski. “I don't want to get pregnant now and then give birth during finals. I can imagine taking an incomplete, never having the time to finish and then flushing my time and effort down the toilet because I couldn't wait two more months.”
In the midst of graduate school Malozowski stumbled upon a full-time job, which was also not in the plan. She knows there are career risks to taking on so much responsibility while trying to get pregnant, but makes it very clear that no job is more important than family.
“I’m good at my job and my performance reviews reflect that,” explains Malozowski. “If my employer gets mad that I’m pregnant, that’s unfortunate for them, but my husband is the primary breadwinner in our house, so I can afford to be a little bit more flip about it because we don't depend on my income to make ends meet.”
Money plays a big role in parenthood
Stacy Zarin Goldberg, 29, a freelance photographer based in Olney, Md. is pregnant with her first child and knew from a young age that babies were in her future, but then the troubled economy put a wrench her plans. Goldberg, who owns her own business, doesn’t have any staff to pick up the slack when she’s on maternity leave.
“I was ready to get pregnant the second I got married, but knew as a couple we weren’t ready financially,” she says. “Because I work on my own, and I’m the breadwinner, we had to have enough money saved up [before getting pregnant].”
Goldberg gave the example of celeb stylist Rachel Zoe. Also the breadwinner in her marriage, Zoe put off having a baby for years because she was scared to slow down and put her business at risk.
“After some convincing from her husband she decided that it was time,” says Goldberg. “They both wanted a baby and she finally gave in. And her business may have suffered a bit, but it was worth it and I know it’s worth the risk for us too.”
Goldberg’s biggest fear is going back to work and not having any clients because they’ve signed contracts with other photographers. Her business is very much based on word of mouth, so when she isn’t working, clients may go elsewhere. Maintaining clients will be a big challenge.
Family support makes all the difference
“I’m very lucky. My mom is retired and my mother-in-law has great work hours. When I’m ready to go back to work, I know I can have a babysitter within seconds,” explains Goldberg.
Goldberg will also get plenty of support from her husband, a Prince George’s County police officer. He has a lot of paternity leave and the flexibility to be there every step of the way.
“Actually leaving the baby may be a problem, but we’ll cross that bridge when we get there.”
